BlaNk

it's been almost a month since i came back to taiwan. I haven't started to find a new job, because i was planning to give myself a bit of time to think about myself and the future. However, I even haven't started yet. 

my mind has been preoccupied by the little alien, my nephew, who's been staying with us in daytime on weekdays. Although it's mainly my mum taking care of him, I am still affected all the time. It's not only because the existence of the little alien, but also the way my mum caring him distracts me a lot. Furthermore, my granny just had a serious fall recently that inevitably requires more of my helps. 

I think I've been lost a bit. I haven't really allowed my mind stopped being occupied the reality, such as Ingress, caring, being held of the worries of money, etc. Hence, I've got to sort it out!

智障

撕裂

可以成為愛嗎

puT Our FEet uP

Source:
http://learnenglish.britishcouncil.org/en/word-street/snowdon

vocabulary & phrase:

• put our feet up
• speak for yourself
• can i just get you to fill this in, please?
• leaflet
• get changed
• i'm all set to go.
• go on / get going
• manicure / pedicure
• volcanic / volcano
• goes all the way 
• locomotive
• how long does it take to get to the top?
• how high is it?
• what are you having?
• get stuck
• make a move
• give you a lift
• what happens.....
• white-water rafting
• thrill seeker
• adrenalin junky
• foaming water
• afloat
• thrills and spills
• railings

Language Focus:

• You're joking, aren't you? ( intonation: up, meaning: asking a question)
• It's lovely, isn't it? (intonation: down, not asking a question)
• we'll speak to you soon, won't we? 
• you don't cycle, do you?

cAmDen

source: 
http://learnenglish.britishcouncil.org/en/word-street/camden

vocabulary:

• candle holder 
• split up
• i'll meet you back here in one hour.
• that should do it.
• What type of thing does she like?
• What do you think of that?
• how about I meet you halfway – 25?
• how did you get on?
• end up buying / end up wearing
• I'll tell you what we'll do.
• we'll call it quits.
• lunch is on me.
• stall
• is best known for...
• spiky
• torn
• safety pin
• stand out
• start out 
• on the catwalks
• come up with (sth)
• imaginative
• futuristic
• baggy
• varied stuff
• I'm really into that.
• (sth) remind (sb) of (sth)

Language focus:

• How are you doing? (how're ya doing) / How are you? / How's it going?
• When I meet someone for the first time, I'll say 'nice to meet you'. (instead of "how do you do?")
• what time do you start work?
• can i try these on, please?  / can i try them on?
• can i have them in a size 6? / have you got them in medium?
• have you got them in another colour? / have you got them in blue?

異世界

或許

重點跟不在旅行

不是玩

不是去哪裡

而是找個小小安靜的異世界

那裡沒有時間

沒有現實

沒有感覺

海風

浪

滿天的星星

大家都說我去玩

大家都說羨慕我出去玩這麼久

我沒有在玩

我只是想找個小小安靜的異世界

SamE sAmE

其實不管你躲到哪個角落

都
一
樣

beLoved star

every time i think about it i feel sad

i will be there always

and do my best to be whatever you need

we will still go wherever we would like to 

i hope everything turns into good 

i hope you don't feel too bad along the road 

 

哪裡？

年紀到了

就有好多有的沒的事情如雨後春筍的冒出來

最近很不寧靜

自己的心情

掛念

依舊還是茫茫然

一瞬間冒了很多事情

好想現在就收收書包搭飛機去哪裡

但是去哪裡？

嘖嘖

thAT dAY...

如果可以無限的出走

一直逃離現實

閃躲所有攻擊

那該有多好

今天這個天氣

突然讓我想起了那天

臨時請了假就出走去一點也不美也不晴天的海邊

我早就忘記是哪個海邊了

但是我記得天氣

陰雨綿綿

但是我就是需要出去    需要海邊

我記得我等車就等了好久好久

我記得還下雨

鞋子外套都淋濕了

今天也是下雨

冷冽的風刺骨吹進站

好像那天

dANgeROUs

看了一些文章，再加上一點反思，突然有個想法：我們所謂的精英教育少了重要的一味--冒險精神。

當然，如果冒險精神用在壞人身上，那就糟糕了，不過我想那是另外一個話題，和“需要冒險精神”這件事不衝突。

自己來的這一趟，自我感覺最良好的時候莫過於是我在倫敦打混摸魚的日子，雖然老是再換住宿，東晃西晃給履歷，斤斤計較著今天還剩多少錢可以吃飯，面試屢屢挫敗......等等，但是，內心反是充足和感恩的。那時候和一位義大利室友聊天，就有聊到這點，彼此都這麼覺得，內心欠缺的其實是自我認同，來到這裡，挑戰了自己選擇的挑戰，這才獲得了一種充實！

一切的旅程都需要個開始，而冒險精神就是促使人們展開旅程的推手。

最近面臨要回家的選擇，腦中又浮現出當初出走時的一些困擾，不知道自己未來的路想怎麼走。就算有點什麼小想法，又覺得太冒險，忍不住問自己真的承擔得起風險嗎？

也許我一直站在“在這方面想太多”的一邊吧！

wAys 2 LeaRN

i have been working on web site development since last Aug. Apart from PHP, which is what i am familiar with, i 've started to learn more about JS/CSS/HTML because there is no dedicated front-end developer (FED) available in my office. Of course don't even mention the UI designer.

to be honest, i am sure that my js code must be very messy in the professional eyes. JS is so different from the language i've learnt so far. basically the learning process is :
a. wondering if i can do it
b. looking it up on google
c. try and error
d. repeat step b and c until the task has done, or give it up and try to think of other possible solutions and re-start from step a

this kind of learning process is fine and rather commonly seen in RD's life. however, lacking of systematical learning procedure is also dangerous, at least to my feeling (ha XD). same situation applies to the way i learn CSS, but the result probably even worse.

all the frustration caused by JS/CSS remind me that i really need a time to learn them step by step. i hope at least after this job, i won't feel hesitant to say i know JS. (as to css...hmmmmmm....let it be bah~~~~lalalalala. )


p.s. 1. however, deep in my mind, i am not really happy with being away from JAVA for such a long time. i have to find another way to get there!

p.s. 2. several topics queuing now:
Android, security programming practices for web development, unit test and refactoring, Python

Tortoise merge

SVN Tortoise

syncing from Trunk to Branch :

1. start from the branch working copy  folder
2. right click Merge > Merge a range of revisions > Next
3. set the field of URL from as the Trunk
4. set the revision to merge > Next
5. clerk Test merge to preview
6. Merge!

ruN

時間跑得很快
轉眼我來英國也一年多了

錯過了老爸老媽的生日就要第二輪啦
猶豫好久的大抉擇
應該就是回家了

不過看到有個文章讓我不禁在駐足了一下：
大多數的人在考慮要不要離職的時候，幾乎都是因為「我不滿意我現在的狀況」，但其中只有很少數人有考慮到「我想要往什麼目標去」。只有你的目標是清楚的，你才不會在該選擇的時候走錯路。所以如果你在考慮要不要離職，最重要應該思考的，應該是「你到底在追求什麼？」以及「現在你和目標之間的落差，是不是離職可以解決的？」

這次之所以這麼難下決定，其實到頭來就是我還不清楚自己的目標是什麼。
幸福的人生。生命現下過得好快。總是沒有暫停鍵，當然也沒有什麼重玩就是了。有時候剩下的就只是“想要“。萬事起頭難，我也不想換工作，每換一次工作都是精神耗損。挑戰，透過這次旅行，回頭看，遙遠的過去也隱隱佐證發揮我能力的環境就是很困難和挑戰。我總愛抱怨，碎碎念卻道也繼續嘗試。我想這就是個性吧。我喜歡嘗試不同的東西，我想體驗一些有的沒得的經驗，也許這就是為什麼我開始旅行吧！
目標，其實倒也不是真的一定要變得多厲害，畢竟很多事情就是等價交換，不用去羨慕。我想我的目標也許不是真的變得多有錢，能力多厲害，職位有多令人敬佩，能和好朋友聚會，分享苦樂，陪伴家人，適合自己的工作環境和薪水，簡單快樂ㄉ健康平安就好。

沒有雄心大志？這就隨意吧。

也許這次的大抉擇，是個點醒我的事件。我，想念旅行。我想念的其實不是路上的風景，是那時候的自己！

大抉擇...

前陣子老闆又再度提起之後我working holiday visa 過期之後，繼續為他們工作的話題。很開心也感謝老闆又再度而且更正式的提起這件事，但是卻讓我面臨重大抉擇。

始終拿不太定主意。趁感冒來好好整頓一下思緒好了。

• 當初來working holiday ”好像“ (XDDDD) 有幾個目標，體驗生活，練英文，探索自我。老媽說：如果你目標還沒達成，那就再多留一年剛好去完成目標。恩....很有道理。大目標來說，國外生活體驗到了一些，服務生當了四個月，在現在公司上班也七個多月，這點應該算是可以說是有滿意。練英文，這可就糟了，雖然身邊一些人說我的英文有進步，但是我自己只能說，聽力有磨練到一點，口說卻一樣爛，單字當然有多學了一些生活用語，發音也有些變化，但整體而言不到我滿足的標準啊.......。探索自我，這又是另外一個大題目，當初決定離開台灣的時候，算是有點階段性厭倦的時段，心知肚明自己的感覺，卻一頭霧水不知道為什麼，期待透過working holiday，也許我會看到什麼，勁兒讓我之後更開心的工作和生活......所以......目前好像還沒達到喲(XDDDDDDDD)
• 衝動尚未達成的小目標不少：
• 在PUB工作
• 在咖啡廳工作，學做咖啡，打奶泡和拉花
• 考個英國駕照
• Paragliding
• 英國旅遊（還有好多地方沒去啊）
• 歐洲旅遊（當初覺得應該有機會吧）
• ........（總覺得還有，待補）
• 當然想台灣。一切都比較舒適。自己的房間，開車騎車，搭大眾交通工具都很方便。想陪家人，想玩小鬼（們），想念和朋友聚會閑晃看電影唱歌的日子。想念食物。
• 回台灣找工作比較沒有語言障礙。
• 在這邊有時候因為語言障礙感覺自己有點像自閉兒了
• 我想重點是精神吧。我還有沒有想繼續挑戰自己呢？
• 如果我沒辦法讓這邊變好，那我可能回去也是一樣吧！重點是把它變好。

(待)

mEEtinGS

i haven't study english for ages. It's time to start again!

Vocabulary and phrases:

• running a meeting:
• run:
  run a bath
• provide sb with sth:
• provide:
  this booklet provides useful information about local services.
• take part in 
• take part: to be involved in an activity with other people
  she doesn't usually take part in any of the class activities.
• i'm joined by
• join: to get involved in an activity or journey with people
  i don't have time for a drink now, but i'll join you later.
  i'm joined by Rob for support
• give you an update on sth
• there are other times
• whatever:
  we'll go whatever the weather.
  whatever happens, you know that i'll stand by you.
• at the ready: prepared to be used or to act immediately
  he stood by the phone, pencil at the ready. 
• put your points across: 
• put sth across: to express your ideas and opinions clearly so that people understand them easily
  it's and interesting idea and i thought he put it across well.
• let's get down to business:
• get down to business: to start talking about the subject to be discussed
  it the introductions are over o'd like to get down to business
• on the agenda
• executor
• go through them in order
• thanks for coming
• the news on sth
• any other business
• chairperson
• in other words
• focusing everyone's attentions on sth
• focus (sb's attention) on/upon sth/sb:
  when the kitchen is finished i'm going to focus my attention on the garden and get that sorted out.
• be up for sth:
• up for (doing) sth: willing and able to do or take part in an activity
  after a long day at work, i wasn't up for a party.
• up for sth: intended, suggested or being considered for something
  are you really up for promotion?
  that house at  the end of our road is up for sale.
  is any idea up for discussion?
• underway: if something is underway, it is happening now.
• the fairy tales range 
• at the beginning of next month
• get this right
• sorry to hold the meeting up: to interrupt the meeting 
• I thought that ....
• any other thoughts
• comment on
• the next matter under discussion
• embargo: to officially stop trading with another country
  they are planning to embargo oil imports.
• enquiry
• sorry to interrupt but ...
• take off
• it's worth V-ing... 
• be worth sth:
  I think this matter is worth our attention.
• be worth doing/having sth:
  it's worth remembering that prices to up on mother's day.
  it you are a young, inexperienced driver, it is worth having comprehensive insurance. 
• how does everyone else feel?
• on the subject of sth 
• listen out for sth 
• i just wanted to ...
• as you know 
• divisive: describes something that causes great and sometimes unfriendly disagreement within a group of people
• separate sth out from sth
• I'd be much happier if ....
• be keen to
• speaking as sb
• bounce ideas off each other:
• bounce sth off sb: if you bounce sth off someone, you tell someone about an idea or plan in order to find out what they think of it.
  Can i bounce a couple of ideas off you?
• forceful 
• i'm afraid i don't agree
• a little less 
• confrontational
• confront: to face, meet, or deal with a difficult situation or person
  I thought i would remain calm, but when i confronted with the TV camera, i became very nervous. 
• I quite agree
• form someone's perspective
• newcomer
• valid
• move on to 
• extract
• bring a meeting to a close
• put sb on the books
• drawings
• portfolios
• in the next couple of days 
• it would be wise to...
• that's probably about it.
• desperately want to raise before we wrap up 
• wrap (sth) up : to complete something successfully
  that just about wraps it up for today.
• conflicts in the diary 
• in the final stage 
• it's time to wrap up
• chairing a meeting
• let's get started
• put forward their opinions

LOST

That feeling has gone.

died out.

i am seriously lost this time. I have to get myself back.
that's is the problem. i have to get myself back.

I can't remember days.
I can't remember voices.
I am totally, throughly, completely lost in the time flood.

i hate it that i have to admit i have changed again. I have been saying this all my life and now even i am here, where i tried to escape to, i am still ridiculously the same.

I am stuck.

the colour, the smell, the everything.
can i mend it? or should i leave? part of my mind knows that i need something.

the challenging, the achievement, the independence.....

變色

很久沒有寫Blog了

自從搬到Windsor之後，再度展開規律的工程師生活。前一兩個月，覺得還是很新鮮，畢竟也好一陣字沒有開始寫程式了，上班時的英文還是覺得有點吃力，剛開始也為了讓自己能趕快上手，花了不少時間讀爛Code。對於大小公司的文化衝擊，感受甚深。自己也不斷的在調整工作態度，修正自己的上班時間，試圖慢慢的找到生活（或旅遊？）與工作的平衡點，希望也許可以領悟個什麼偉大的原則，取經回臺！

漸漸的，試用期也如預測的過了。一切都開始漸漸的穩定，發現抱怨又多了，路上的風景又變無趣了，其實，心底明顯地感覺到有什麼東西變色了，可惜我不知道是什麼。我離開軌道很久了，很久了。

新年的開始，讓我重新許下願望，一切重新來過吧！