May i?

Often, I felt there is no way home.

This morning i walked along the avenue from the back door of the college to the physics building, so-called my second place.
The rainy day mixed with the scent of the moist soil and grass and the scoured blacktop smells brisk.
However, I had been starting to get a sudden headache and to ponder.

Sometimes I felt unrelieved even though everything seemed to have an turning point, such as the commencement or whatever.
But, be honest, I am not ready.
Although i did have quite a few expectations and dreams, i just cannot move on.
I now have faintest idea about what i shall base upon and dream of.
Just as my daughter in the Princess Maker, I am used to look before i leap.
That's the significant motivity of my travel.
I hope that i won't hear those discouraged voice about my trip or my preparation.
It doesn't mean that i cannot accept any suggestion.
Just give me a break this time.